Groomsman Guide 101 - Share this with all of your Groomsmen!
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Groomsman Guide 101 - Share this with all of your Groomsmen!

Updated: May 13, 2023


Groomsmen tacking a Groom on his Wedding Day

When it comes to choosing your groomsmen, you probably know who you want to represent you when you say "I do" but they might need some tips on how to best represent you. Send this link to your boys, and tell them to pay attention! This guide covers some of the most common mistakes I see groomsmen making.


Just a few minor changes and respect from your groomsmen adhering to these simple rules can really help ensure you have great wedding photos!


Tip #1 - Empty those pockets


Before anyone walks down the aisle, everyone should make sure that their pockets are empty, particularly in the front. Cell phones, wallets, and keys are the biggest culprits here, and they just don't look professional. These distractions are hard to edit out, especially if the pants have a deep texture to them. Do us all a favor, and take a load off.


Tip #2 - Make a hand plan


During the rehearsal, the groomsmen should make a plan as to how they will be holding their hands. Bridesmaids have it easy here because their hands are typically pre-occupied holding bouquets. There are typically five ways groomsmen can hold their hands. Two are acceptable, and the other three are no-no-no's. Whichever stance you choose, just PLEASE make sure you're all doing the same thing. Don't mix up the stance that the Bride or Groom clarify they want during the rehearsal.


Acceptable Stance #1: Parade Rest. This is where the groomsmen typically hold their hands behind their back. This is one of my favorites, however, it is important to keep a little bit of bend at the elbow so they protrude out. If you don't do that, it looks like you have a bunch of armless friends, ha.


Acceptable Stance #2: Hands folded in front. This is the most common, but it is critical you don't get lazy throughout the ceremony and let the hands drop. Keep the hands folded and on top of your belly button. Don't let your hands weigh down until your elbows are locked and you're in the "Fig Leaf" pose.


No-No #1: The "fig leaf". This is where hands are folded in front, little to no bend in the elbows, and it looks like you're trying to guard yourself from getting racked.


No-No #2 and #3: Crossed arms, and hands in pockets.

The "fig leaf" is the most common mistake groomsmen make with their hands.

Tip #3 - Ditch the sunglasses


'Nuff said.


Tip #4 - Make sure your shoes match


While you don't have to all have the same type of shoe, they should all be the same color. I'm even okay with mixing up a patent leather style with a more suede/matte version, but whatever you do, make 'em match!


Tip #5 - Wear your suit and tie correctly


Tradition calls for a single breasted suit jacket to only be buttoned on the top button. Double breasted and three piece suits should be fully buttoned. Also, if you are wearing a tie, please make sure it extends down to the middle of your belt. There are different poses you'll be doing where it looks better for you to have your jacket unbuttoned, and if your tie is too short you'll look like a tool. If you need help tying your tie on the day of the wedding, please let me know. I'm happy to help.


Tip #6 - Establish, mark, and pay attention to your stance during rehearsal


The trick here is to look uniform. Make sure that you are all standing at the same angle, and on top of the same "mark" that should be established during rehearsal. I recommend using temporary chalk spray paint, or small stakes with flags to help you know where to stand on the day-of. My favorite stance is a 3/4 stance where you can see the bride and groom, but also are visible to the Wedding guests.


Groomsmen: Remember what this day is all about!


These tips are small, but mighty examples of things that you can do to help make your boy have amazing photos from his wedding day. Please put in the effort to pay attention during rehearsal, and please keep your body tight and in-check throughout the course of the ceremony. The reception will soon be following, and you can get your party on then, but for the ceremony, please put in the effort to make sure your brother gets some kick ass photos of his ceremony. A lot of planning, time and effort has gone into this ceremony and this is one area where you want to remember that being asked to represent the groom is an honor and they are counting on you do the right thing and represent him well!

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